I thought I knew who I was...
Discover more from Naked and Exposed ® Journal by Janae Carlee
April 11, I wrote,
I'm back at the intersection of asking God, "who am I?"
I've realized in immaturity I've attached personal desire to faith and expected different outcomes.
Now... life looks different, feels freer, and I wonder was all this to get me to a place of deeper surrender? The vision is manifesting differently.
Like... In our obedience to follow Him, God knows we have to be processed to release what we thought was Him. But we had to start somewhere!
I thought I knew who I was, but was all of this to get me to a deeper place of surrender and obedience?
For the last three years, going on four, I have been actively pursuing a relationship with the Lord. I've become intentional about my healing and self-discovery process through the lens of God as a father.
Refresher: God is not our natural fathers. Where they lack, He makes up for the rest. We must see God for who He is based on his word and not our experiences from reality.
Three months ago, if you asked me where I was headed, I'd give you the next five years of my life. In February, God told me to give what I think it's to look like back to him—starting with my business.
Many of you know I stepped out on faith to launch an agency-style design studio from scratch in October of 2019. With no active promotion, the Lord brought over a hundred people to inquire about my services and 70 something becoming actual clients in one year.
In a panoramic, panini, pandemic, God did it.
Then the Lord began to deal with me on the next transition…
I will testify about this in detail on July 17, 2021, during the naked and exposed showcase. All the details release May 2. Join the waitlist to be the first to know and receive exclusive access to the journals, t-shirts, and newest poetry book.
As the Lord began to deal with me on the next transition, it required me to relinquish my control, plans, and understanding to follow Him.
Obedience is better than sacrifice (1 Samuel 15:22)
It's safe to say I've been here before (2019 Showcase Theme).
👉🏾 I have proof God has:
Provided,
Protected, and
solidified my Purpose as a father does.
I have documented evidence—receipts and stones, voice memos, and journals.
Need proof? Bet, watch this video of how God used the numbers 50 and 25 to communicate a message to me.
We have biblical proof—my favorite, Joseph. What Joseph saw in a vision during his youth looked nothing like the physical manifestation of what occurred. He went from home to pit to sold into slavery to Potiphar's house to prison to second in command—22 years of process.
I am sure it included a lot of questions… like God, who am I?
I've been here before…
In 2017, I found myself newly graduated, without a job, and back living at home. I went from a vision of working for ESPN to… don't even ask me what the next two hours will look like because I do not know.
It was there God began to communicate Psalms 91:4— He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.
I thought I knew who I was, but was all of this to get me to a deeper place of surrender and obedience? I've been here before.
If you listened to the proof video, you'd realize Dr. Mathew Stevenson mentions Moses at the age of 25 (the age I am currently). He then says, "Just like most 25 years old's, they don't know who they are. […] (paraphrasing) We go through seasons where God begins to put pressure on our identity, having us ask deeper questions of who we are."
That's me. Here I am.
Because I have been here before, I know this is just God's way of removing what cannot for the next phase of this journey. It requires:
Evaluation
Rest
Removal and,
Adjustments
Often, the darkness, the lack of vision is because we are so close to the Lord that in this season, He is building our trust to rest in Him as He gives us the next step when we need it.
It's uncomfortable!
Cause if you ask me why I am doing something, my only answer will be, "BECAUSE GOD TOLD ME." I do not have any logical reasoning—just a bunch of faith and proof God speaks.
We have proof! God has seen us through moments of uncertainty. If you need evidence, start by acknowledging you're living in answered prayer now and begin documenting the process (journals dropping soon).
It's interesting when I go back and look at all the showcase names:
Challenge Accepted (2018).
Mountain, Move: I've been here before (2019).
The Show Must Go On (2020) and,
Only Up From Here (July 17, 2021).
God's been preparing us. He's in the details. The collection I am dropping for showcase participants first is titled Keep Going (in the details).
I thought I knew who I was, but was all of this to get me to a deeper place of surrender and obedience? I've been here before.
Through it all… we must keep going.
We are children of God.
God is not a man who should lie.
God is our defender and judge.
God is on our side.
Let's evaluate, rest, remove and adjust what's needed for the days ahead. Today we don't know who we are. Tomorrow we see how far we've come.
Keep going.
🚀 Share with someone who needs encouragement.
🚀 Replay to this message by typing, Only Up From here, if you agree.
🚀Join the 2021 showcase waitlist by texting “showcase” or via sign-up via email.
Keep Going collection to include journals, t-shirts, and my latest poetry book will release first to showcase participants.
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